How To Fake Your Way Through A 'Game Of Thrones' Conversation

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‘Game of Thrones’ is back and suddenly everyone is a fan. Go to class and your friends are talking about it. Head to the hospital and the nurses are gushing about it. Head on home and your Nan is probably watching it too. Jon Snow this, Khaleesi that. It’s enough to drive anyone who doesn’t watch the show insane.

And then to top it all off, when you admit that you don’t watch it, everyone behaves as if you just announced that you kick small puppies for fun.

In all honesty, it’s much better to just keep that little nugget of information to yourself. But how do you go about that when those god awful Game of Thrones conversations arise in your presence? Do you walk away? Nod and smile? Casually begin to dig a hole in the ground so you can escape at any given moment? Break into song? Quickly change the subject? Immediately strip naked with the hopes of distraction? Punch yourself in the face until the nightmare ends?

Well, we suggest that you just pretend to know what the hell is going on.

Before you ask ‘how’, we’ve compiled a short list of things that you can say that will definitely make people believe that you’re a Game of Thrones fan – even though you’re not. Repeat these phrases throughout a conversation and we’re pretty sure that your secret will be safe (at least until the finale).

So, here it goes:

  • “Did you watch last night’s episode? So much death, right?”

Someone always dies in an episode of Game of Thrones. It’s a part of life.

  • “That sex scene was so tame in comparison to the one in the last episode.”

Much like the dying, there’s always a lot of sex in each episode of Game of Thrones. You could easily swap out the word ‘sex’ with ‘death’ and it would still make a bunch of sense, to be honest.

  • “Khaleesi/Daenerys is such a boss. I can’t wait for another Dracarys moment.”

Every Game of Thrones fan knows about the Dracarys moment, so if you drop this into a conversation when Khaleesi or Daeneyrs Targaryen is mentioned in a conversation, people will believe that you’re down with the kids.

  • “I can’t wait for Arya Stark to reunite with her family again. It’s been too long!”

Listen, it is season seven and poor Arya still hasn’t met Jon Snow, Bran or Sansa Stark. We’re betting that this wont change until the finale or something (that’s if she doesn’t die). You can slip this into the conversation with full confidence that your friends will knowingly agree with you.

  • “Well, you know what they say – Winter is here!”

This could totally be your back-up phrase when you’re unsure about what to say. For example, if someone mentions the Whitewalkers, just smile, shrug and say this phrase. We’re sure that they will nod and laugh with you.

  • “Yeah, that was bad, but it doesn’t hold a candle to the Red Wedding. Am I right?”

The Red Wedding massacre was, for many fans, the most horrific slaughter in Game of Thrones history. So whenever you hear that someone died in an awful way on the show, you can say this, and everyone will most likely agree with you.

  • “Yeah, he was stupid, but not as stupid as Rickon when he didn’t run in zig-zags.”

Once again, a no-brainer. Everyone knows that Rickon would probably be alive if he knew not to run in a straight line when someone is shooting arrows at you. This happened in the finale episodes of last season. Mention this when someone calls out a character for being stupid, and they will, once again, agree with you.

There you have it! A few generic phrases to get you through the next couple weeks. Of course, these phrases only apply to episodes prior to the finale. Once the last two episodes of Game of Thrones come around, we suggest that you go into hiding and don’t come out until about two days (or weeks) later. Hopefully, by then, the hype would have calmed down. Whilst these phrases could easily be a hit or miss, it is, in our opinion, the only way to seem like a pro.

Of course, the other solution would be for you to just go ahead and watch the bloody show, like the rest of us. 

Let us know in the comments if you have any more generic Game of Thrones phrases to add to this list! 

Images via HBO/Twitter/Giphy

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