The NHS Has Revealed The 20 Worst Pains Known To Humankind
Pain is obviously something that everyone has experienced at one time or another.
Everyone always thinks they’ve suffered the most though, and for some people, it always seems like a competition and a way of one upping someone about who’s had it worst – “I’ve had (insert illness here) and it’s the WORST pain ‘ever’,” to which someone else replies, “well I had (so and so) and that was DEFINITELY the worst pain ‘ever'” – and so on and so forth.
We get it, it hurt.
Thankfully, the NHS has compiled a list of the 20 most painful conditions known to humans, so we can finally put the arguments to bed. I’m not exactly sure of the science behind measuring pain, but essentially, if you haven’t suffered from one of these, you’ve never even experienced pain and you need to man up.
Take a look and see how many you’ve had:
Shingles: When you eat too many Pringles and shit yourself (jk – it’s actually a skin rash that can cause nerve damage).
Cluster headaches: Essentially a really painful headache in one area of your head that you just can’t get rid off.
Heart attack: If you aren’t sure what this is, you’re beyond help.
Slipped disc: When discs of cartilage in the spine are damaged and press on the nerves causing you to an immense amount of discomfort/pain.
Complex Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS): There’s nothing worse than having CRPS. It’s basically a pain that lingers after an injury and can cause swelling and skin damage that is often worse than the original injury.
Arthritis: Inflammation of the joints that actually affects around 10 million people in the UK.
Migraine: I’m sure everyone’s had one.
Gout: Swelling in the joints, usually your foot.
Broken bones: Not too sure what this is…
Kidney stones: Imagine pissing a sizeable rock out that tiny wee hole of yours. Nothing that big should be passing through a tube that small – which is why it’s so damn painful.
Sciatica: The sciatic nerve is the longest nerve in your body and any irritation of this nerve can lead to a real pain in your arse (literally) and legs.
Frozen shoulder: Not to be mistaken for the cold shoulder, it’s when your shoulder joint becomes inflamed and hurts like hell.
Appendicitis: Not that you need it anyway, but it’s when your appendix swells and causes abdominal pain.
Pancreatitis: Like the thing above but in your pancreas. Obviously.
Stomach ulcer: You know how annoying/sore a mouth ulcer can be? Imagine it in your tum-tum.
Trigeminal neuralgia: Although it sounds like a mathematical term, it’s actually a really intense pain in your face – which, ironically, maths can cause too.
Endometriosis: Usually, the ones you struggle to pronounce are the worst. It’s tissue growing outside the uterus instead of inside it. Ouchie.
Fibromyalgia: WIDESPREAD PAIN ALL OVER YOUR BODY – basically, you’re fucked.
Pain after an operation: Probably the vaguest of pains, it pretty much does what it says on the tin.
In case you were wondering why pregnancy isn’t featured on the list, it’s because it specifically refers to painful ‘conditions,’ which pregnancy isn’t the last time I checked. Depending on how bad it was though, and how the child turned out, you may argue otherwise.
Sure, those conditions mentioned sound all painful and stuff, but we all know there are way worse pains out there that many of us suffer on a day to day basis.
Check out our list below:
Standing on a plug.
Breaking up with a partner.
Getting shampoo in your eyes.
Taking a football to the nut-sack.
Pretending to like a gift when really you hate it.
Stubbing your big toe.
Going to any family gathering.
Biting your tongue.
Going to the dentist.
Dropping your phone on your face when you’re lying in bed.
Looking directly at the sun.
Getting a splinter.
Listening to someone constantly talk about themselves.
Getting in a hot car with no air-con.
Being at work.
Burning the roof of your mouth with a red hot pizza.
Watching an episode of The Big Bang Theory.
What do you think of both lists, can you think of any others? Let us know in the comments below!
Images via iStock/GIPHY