There's Some F*cked Up Penis Masks Available For Halloween
I’ve always wondered what it must be like to have a penis.
Aside from the obvious pros of being able to stand up to piss, I’ve always been intrigued by what it must be like to have your main man just dangling between your legs, unprotected from the big wide world.
VIDEO: The Over-trusting Boyfriend
But, alas, I’ll never know the truth so I guess I’ll just have to stick with wearing a penis mask on my head this Halloween. Yes, because after the monstrosity that is the vagina mask went on sale, it was only right that the penis mask made an appearance.
Now they may not be as horrendously realistic as the vagina masks, but they are even more hilarious. Here’s Ebay’s top three, in my humble opinion:
Penis Dickhead Latex Willy Mask Prank Party Costume Hen Stag Halloween Joke Gift
This little guy just yells, “I’m a no frills penis mask, baby, it’s OK to laugh at me.” I’m dubious about how well you’ll be able to see out of the eye -holes, but your friends will lol so much it’s definitely worth the £15.33.
Men Dick Head Full Overhead Latex Rubber Mask Fancy Dress Stag Hen Party Costume
Coming in at £15.99, this bad boy comes in two different colours: incarnadine pink and incarnadine red. Nice! It also features deeper grooves and at 60cm in circumference, he sure is girthy. I especially like the attention to detail around the tip – no one’s going to question what’s on your head if you walk in with this particular accessory to the party.
Funny Half Face Mask Old Man Dick Nose Willy Face Masks Grey Stag Party Costume
You’re a funny kind of guy, but going full dick mask just isn’t for you? Well then this little beauty, which is only £6.99, is the person Halloween must-have. It’s an old man, who somehow, had ended up with a dick for a nose. Hilarious, and also scary, which to be frank, is what any good Halloween outfit should be about.
Will you be investing in some penis paraphernalia this spooky season? Let us know in the comments.
Images via Ebay and MyTalk