The 5 Things You Need To Know Today


Because we all need ammunition for the pub…

1. Ed Sheeran finally reveals why he had such a big grin on his face at the Victoria’s Secret show.

Speaking to an American radio show he said.

“It was fun, but I kind of felt like the hobbit in the elven kingdom! Can I tell you why I was laughing? Basically there were all these big inflatable bouncy black balls that are bouncing around in the crowd on the finale bit,” he explained.

“Ariana Grande comes up and stands up next to me and just looks at me and goes, ‘I love big black balls’. In my head I was like, ‘If she knows what that means then I love her, and if she doesn’t know what that means, it’s even better!”


2. A mountain-sized asteroid is heading towards earth.

Don’t panic too much, it’s not due to hit for another 150 years. The huge space rock, named ‘2014 UR116’, crosses paths with our planet every three years. Russian scientist Vladimir Lipunov has been making the claims, but NASA don’t seem too fussed, saying that it is nothing to worry about.



3. Porn censorship to be protested with mass ‘face-sitting’ outside Parliament

Around 500 people to engage in a fully-clothed face-sitting protest in Westminster on Friday in response to the recent changes to UK pornography regulations. Face-sitting was one of the acts outlined to be banned, along with others including fisting, spanking, caning, female ejaculation, and humiliation.

It’s a poorly kept secret that porn is among the most popular things on the Internet, did the government really think that people would take this lying down?


4. Maths reveals how to make the perfect doughnut.

Apparently it’s all about the squidge factor, and a formula has been generated that identifies the perfect ‘squidgy to crispy ratio’ for ring doughnuts. The formula is below. If it leaves you as totally baffled as it does us, then all we need to do is hope that the powers that be in doughnut land have taken the research on board.


5. The most viral video of the year has been announced.

YouTube have announced the dog dressed as a mutant spider prank is the most popular video of 2014. It must be a slap in the face to all those people that chose to bend their iPhone 6. The dog with eight legs has 14 million more views than the second placed Nike advert, with 113 million to date.

It’s always worth another watch, and here it is in full.


>>These guys get paid millions and they still mess up!

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